by Shari McMinn

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect (Romans 12:2 ESV).

Some children, and parents, suffer from mental health issues from time to time — or even consistently throughout their lifetime. I believe this is a much-neglected and maligned topic in homeschooling circles. The cultural overdose through various media platforms and modern psychological promotion of prescription drugs, along with often fruitless “therapeutic” counseling, confuses the issue for concerned parents. No wonder our vulnerable children are obsessively wondering about themselves and who God created them to be. 

It is up to us, as their attentive parents, to guide them through a culture that wants to constantly label them with perceived or diagnosed mental health issues. How are we to help them renew their mind to have the mind of Christ and not the mind of cultural psychobabble?

Oftentimes, the modern church adds to this muddled mess with the simultaneous push of man-created doctrines and the false belief that all mental issues are rooted in sin. While sinful choices can certainly exacerbate mental health problems, sin is not always the root cause of anxiety, depression, eating, and sleep disorders. More severe mental health problems such as bipolar, disassociation, somatic, and schizophrenia disorders can be based on biological and neurological complexities that need professional help (and possibly well-chosen prescription medications) to recover from or endure as a lifelong burden.

From Stress to Struggles That Require Support

One of my adopted daughters had many labels when she came to us, including Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). These would manifest troubling actions when she was under more than a typical day’s stress. I would often go looking for her when I knew she was troubled with a heavy mental health burden, finding her in her room tearing up paper after paper and looking with glassy eyes into some distant place in her imagination. It was scary for me and trauma-triggering for her. 

She was under the care of a wise Christian mental health therapist who was trained in many sub-specialties, including working with children with PTSD and adoption-placement distress. Her weekly therapeutic visits were just part of our homeschooling schedule and, over time, helped her gain calming coping skills, along with being able to put into words what she was experiencing and feeling during such episodes.

This same daughter did make some sinful choices, which complicated her mental health issues. These besetting sins, unfortunately, led to her drug addiction and then finally to her untimely death just before her 19th birthday. It was a very difficult time for me as I mentally reviewed every informed, positive choice we had made to help her and the tragic choices she had made along the way. Ultimately, I knew that God made the final choice in gathering her to Himself to end her suffering and keep our family safe from her endangering behaviors. 

Despite her sin, she was a baptized, born-again Christian with the fruits of the Holy Spirit evident in her life. For that, I was thankful! And I have the God-promised hope of seeing her again in Heaven.

Several of my other children dealt with anxiety and depression over the course of their teen years. Some were willing to go to counseling with that same helpful therapist, and some were not. We put into action a number of relationship-based practices that helped them, as well as my husband and myself, while we assisted each of them through those difficult times.

Ideas that might help your family include the following:

• Allow the use of sound-canceling headphones for noise overload, including during car rides.
• Attend church weekly together as a family, with a discussion of Bible Truths afterward.
• Be together one-on-one as parent-child as much as possible for chores, walks, and just talking.
• Consider mental health therapy for children willing to go, sometimes for/with the parent.
• Delay the use of smartphones and social media, and train your maturing teen how to safely use them.
• Do not allow a child to isolate themself for more than two or three hours daily.
• Do not shame your child for their mental health issues; work with him or her to resolve them.
• Eat a healthy diet with made-from-scratch recipes that include plenty of good fats and protein.
• Have daily personal devotions and daily family prayer with Bible-based discussion.
• Help your child focus on reality, along with their imaginary world.
• Include art, exercise, music, or other individually positive activities to help with calming as a part of daily school assignments; these might eventually develop into personally satisfying hobbies.
• Memorize Scripture verses or hymns to recall during times of anxiety or depression.
• Limit technology usage; use it as a reward for all assigned schoolwork and chores being completed.
• Plan for mid-day naps or “quiet time” after school, alone in individual spaces.
• Provide opportunities for working with hands in the garage, kitchen, shop, or yard.
• Provide 24/7/365 supervision at home and during church, homeschool, and community group gatherings.
• Read more non-fiction books (biographies) or classic fiction rather than modern fantasy fiction.
• Require physical activity outside as the weather allows; bundle up for cold, rain, or snow.
• Schedule for plenty of sleep each night (8-12+ hours as their bodies need).

A very helpful local resource for Colorado families with struggling learners is Dianne Craft and her website. I appreciated this quote about insufficient nutrition as a potential cause for depression from one of Dianne’s online articles:

“The incidence of depression has skyrocketed in children and adults since World War II. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported that 11 percent of Americans over the age of 12 take anti-depressants. What is going on? Researchers report that blood levels of inflammatory markers such as C-reactive protein are frequently elevated in those diagnosed with depression. Could inflammatory changes in the brain be one of the main drivers behind our epidemic of depression? This may also explain why anti-depressant medications often do not work for people with depression. Emory University in Atlanta confirmed the depression/inflammatory connection. Fortunately, there are natural ways to reduce inflammation. The most effective way includes a diet high in Omega 3 fatty acids, specifically DHA in fish oil. 

Dr. Michael Norden, a practicing psychiatrist in New York, uses essential fatty acids, and particularly fish oils for his patients who are suffering from depression. Using fish oil in addition to medication, and sometimes without medication, Dr. Norden reports impressive relief from depression among his patients. Likewise, Dr. Andrew Stall, a physician from Harvard has found that the DHA in fish oil has proven to be extremely helpful in patients suffering with postpartum depression, bipolar, ADD, and ADHD.” — Dianne Craft

Trust in the Lord’s Guidance for Your Family

After our family seemed to be faced with one trauma and then another during the last decade of homeschooling and raising my children as a widow on our remote farm, three of my children moved with me to our current home in Florida. It was a new season of rest, refreshment, and rebuilding for us. I realized that not only did I need 10-14 hours of sleep nightly, but so did two of my adopted children — both teens at the time.

Sleep is restorative, and my teens listened to their bodies telling them what they needed. I did not wake them up in the morning, nor did they set their alarms unless they needed to get up for work or other appointments. My one child needed this extra sleep for about six months. My other child needed a year to finally catch up on bodily rest that was sorely needed. Concerned family members and well-meaning friends questioned what I was allowing them to do. But instinctively, I knew their mental health needed this extra rest before the next season of their lives as full-time working adults. I sought the Lord for what I should do as their parent, and I trusted my gut to not only allow this extra sleep but encourage it.

I believe God gives attentive moms and dads His wisdom for observing and then acting on what their children need. Children’s bodies and minds can be renewed under the caring wisdom of parents who seek the Lord in prayer and Bible study, and God directs us in what we should do for our kids. Whether it is an emotional, physical, or spiritual need our child has, our go-to should always be God’s Word and will. If we seek Him in all things, He will direct our paths to help our children that He has created for His glory. I encourage you to be under the guidance of wise Christian church elders with whom you can discuss your child’s mental health issues and other needs in confidence, seeking their prayers and biblically based guidance for what is often a difficult journey. 

Parents need tremendous support in raising their children with these unique needs. Do not be intimidated or hesitant to seek the help you need for your child and even for yourself. If you cannot find a qualified Christian counselor near you, please visit the first link below for potential telehealth appointment therapists. Be sure to ask about their certification(s) for you and your child’s area(s) of need.

Here are some resources to check out for homeschooling your child with mental health issues:

• Association of Biblical Counselors locator for tele-appointments 
• Generations’ radio program discussing mental health issues in children   
• Helpful articles and information on mental health from Focus on the Family’s website  
• Web article explaining the most common types of mental health disorders 

My next Unique Learner blog, “Sensory Issues: Seeking or Avoiding?” will be posted on April 23, 2025 (the 4th Wednesday).

Shari McMinn, your trusted homeschooling friend

P.S. If you have a topic I should write about, please email me with your suggestion(s). This blog is for you!

About the Author: Shari McMinn

Shari Howard McMinn has graduated from homeschool teaching and is a professional editor, public speaker, and writer. After living in Colorado for 45 years, she continues to work remotely for Christian Home Educators of Colorado (CHEC) from her new home in the Fort Myers, Florida area. Shari is the author of five books, which are detailed on her website, ShariMcMinn.com. She is an advocate for adoption, homeschooling, safe and stable families, and unique learners. A few years ago, she entered a very fun new season of life: grandparenting! She is available to answer your questions via email, Shari@CHEC.org.