By guest author Brandee Gillham
As my cowboy and I are working on transitioning our life to having four boys in our band of cowpokes I found myself under attack. I was trapped by the toddler. Our third son is about as rough and wooly as they get. His older brothers have toughened him up very quickly and he is a child we will have to put a tight set of reins on to control his eager spirit (figuratively speaking, of course).
I was in town the other day with my two littlest ‘pokes. The baby needed to eat so I scooted to the back seat, vented the windows and let the toddler out of his car seat. This was my first mistake. Always keep the toddler restrained when you are trapped in a vehicle with him!
The lil’ ‘poke sweetly mentioned crawling up to the front seat. I sincerely tried to discourage him, but I was in no position to resist his movement. Off he went and unfortunately he found the car keys while unloading and scattering the contents of my purse. This lil’ fella is pretty smart and managed to put the keys in the ignition. Still being trapped in the back while feeding the baby I simply tried to discourage the toddler from starting the car. He was able to turn it on accessory and that’s when the party started.
All of sudden I had windshield wipers going, I was turning left, and the radio was blasting, all while we were sitting still in the parking lot on a dry day. He adjusted all of the mirrors for me — some with his naughty little hands, some with his head while he was jumping on the seat.
He managed to readjust the seats, get the vehicle in 4-wheel drive and lock the doors. In my desire to discretely feed my baby in the back seat, my toddler was doing everything he could to draw attention to our vehicle.
He finally won that battle when he activated the car alarm. That stinkin’ red button is just so easy to find on the car keys. Who came up with that plan? I guarantee you it was not anyone who had ever been trapped by a toddler in a car!
The baby finally finished nursing, and I had to come up with my escape plan. Said toddler, was clearly in control of the situation and sitting in the driver seat. I couldn’t just circle around the car and retreat, but I had to stand my ground and recover my vehicle.
I knew better than to close the door because that lil’ ‘poke knew how to lock them and I would have had two trapped ‘pokes. I was regaining my confidence in overcoming the situation, when his mischievous little grin appeared. That naughty little outlaw smashed his face and nose against the window and left a trail of slime. He made me consider going through the car wash with his window open… I didn’t!
If any of you have ever wondered if we are born sinners, you have never been trapped in a car with a toddler. The answer, if you are wondering, is…YES! I was successfully captured by a cowpoke, and just barely escaped.
As I buckled this chubby-cheeked, blue-eyed cowpoke back into his car seat, his adorable lil’ voice said, “Mama, do it again?” “No thank you buddy! Mama just burned 5000 calories and I barely walked around the vehicle.” Thank you, Jesus, for making moments like these absolutely hysterical to look back on!
I really am so very thankful that the Lord does give us opportunities to laugh — sometimes it is about our own misfortune, but really just a hysterical moment in time. Even though I was so stressed while this was all occurring, I can look back on this point in time and know that the Lord was reminding me that He is in control of everything. The small things. The big things. Allllll the things.